Our culture is experiencing a great moral shift. Where decades ago, the American Dream was to have a family and a white picket fence, this dream doesn’t seem to fit our generation’s ideals. Even as contraception became more readily available and people started having multiple sexual partners before settling down, they eventually did commit to one person. Now more than ever before cheating runs rampant amongst committed partners. Everyone knows someone who was cheated on, whether it’s a high school friend or a couple that broke up after ten years of marriage. Older generations claim that we’re just afraid of commitment. However, when having multiple “side chicks” is promoted by every trendy male artist, are we truly afraid of commitment, or do we just think it’s acceptable to cheat on our partners?
With so many artists following the norm, artists who don’t are bound to stand out. Ed Sheeran has made his entire career writing and performing songs that glorify loving one woman. He has topped the charts with “Thinking Out Loud” in 9 countries and the video is the twenty-ninth most viewed video on YouTube. The video itself is completely G-rated, featuring nothing but Ed Sheeran dancing with Brittany Cherry. Sheeran doesn’t need expensive sports cars and scantily clad women to make his music sell; his heartfelt lyrics are enough. His success, especially amongst women, shows that the way women are presented by most musical artists is not the way women actually want to be treated.
Maybe Ty Dolla $ign, with lyrics such as “I never make them hoes my missus,” thinks having more than one girlfriend is the height of modern relationships, but a quick scan through the comments of his videos and Sheeran’s videos shows who has won the hearts of women. While “Paranoid” features many enlightening comments such as, “NO more hoes comin to my crib” and “i have hella bitchies,” “Thinking Out Loud” has comments such as “Future Wedding Song” and “Makes me believe in love :) <3.” Very few comments on Ty Dolla $ign’s song are from females and among those that are, they are overwhelmingly negative. The relationship presented in “Paranoid” may seem appealing to young men, but “Thinking Out Loud,” and Ed Sheeran’s success in general, is a much better indicator for the ideal relationship, at least through young women’s eyes.
These songs with lyrics about lusting after multiple women are a side-effect of a flaw in the way young men are raised. When they’re just boys, they’re told to “man up” and stop showing their emotions. As they grow older, they sometimes lack the tools necessary to express themselves. Because these emotionally stunted men cannot express love and still feel manly, they turn to expressing lust, which seems safer due to the way advertisers play on it. Conversely, the success of songs such as “Thinking Out Loud” shows that women are much more interested in a sensitive man that can express his feelings than a man who can only show sexual desires. If most women want a sentimental man and women still tend to be the primary caregivers for their children, why are young men still told it’s wrong for them to express true emotions?
By wearing his heart on his sleeve and putting his feelings on display for the whole world, Ed Sheeran has taken a small step to help change the way male emotions are viewed by society. With lyrics such as “when my hair’s all but gone and my memory fades and the crowds don’t remember my name,” Sheeran is showing that love is more valuable than looks or fame. Where so many other artists are concerned with Bugattis and the thrills of life, Sheeran’s lyrics show he’d leave it all for love. He isn’t ashamed of his feelings; he is proud of them. Instead of suppressing his strong desire to feel love, he embraces it and explicitly asks for it in his music. Perhaps this song, and others that are similar, may inspire young men to take back their emotions and think beyond the stereotypes they’ve been forced to fit.
